They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
If a woman tells you she has been pink socked...don't move forward with her.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Randomize