You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
