look to my right... shes dancing like she's playing dance dance revolution and her character is a retarded, drunken moose
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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