You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
She gave you a handy in the bar and you were surprised she was good with a dick?
Hahah good point
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize
