i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
"you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
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