i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
All I have in my new place is coke and a treadmill.. it's workout Wednesday
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
