they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
