So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
We went there specifically for you to break it off with him and I walk in on you two in the bathroom with his dick in your mouth
but he had pizza... so i win
I give up.
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
