Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
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