i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
he told me to take care of him and then he asked me to walk him to his hotel. I already have a pussy. I don't need another one
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
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