Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
don't worry, i already broke the ice when i told the story about how i super glued a picture of big bird to my vag.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
You know you're a whore when you color code your calendar with who you slept with on what day incase you have ANOTHER pregnancy scare
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
