I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
his mom fetish really needs to stop. this is literally the 5th time i've come home from work and there's been some random skank and her kids in the living room.
did one of the kids use their poo like a crayon on the wall this time?
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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