Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Defrosting my mini wheats in the microwave was a bad choice
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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