yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
It wasn't your birthday, you weren't supposed to be the drunk one
When people keep buying you drinks at the bar because they like you, you can't say no to them
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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