i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
I am sorry, you're response was not recognized. Please try again.
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Randomize
