I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
