I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
He taught me how to drive a stick by using his dick. He even made the whurrrr noise so I knew when to change gears.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
There is a good chance that the other night after a wedding reception i was at that i mailed you a drink coaster.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
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