Texts From Last Night

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  (269): View more from Michigan

  I'm on that like soy sauce on rice

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  (269): I'm on that like soy sauce on rice http://tfl.nu/53vn
  Replies (3) Good night (1417) Bad night (628)
• Favorite

  (206): View more from Washington

  got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache

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  (206): got in a fight at the bar because some dude thought i was being sarcastic when i told him "sweet mustache". it really was a sweet mustache http://tfl.nu/qh4z
  Replies (23) Good night (4497) Bad night (1228)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.

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  (904): You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus. http://tfl.nu/zy6a
  Replies (37) Good night (4795) Bad night (878)
• Favorite

  (203): View more from Connecticut

  She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone

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  (203): She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone http://tfl.nu/bzdp
  Replies (25) Good night (6443) Bad night (1171)
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  he asked me to smell his eyeballs.

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  (319): he asked me to smell his eyeballs. http://tfl.nu/b2rr
  Replies (20) Good night (1060) Bad night (5141)
• Favorite

  (630): View more from Illinois

  You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.

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  (630): You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup. http://tfl.nu/bmm0
  Replies (38) Good night (1802) Bad night (6033)
• Favorite

  (415): View more from California

  so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?

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  (415): so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then? http://tfl.nu/dz1l
  Replies (19) Good night (3590) Bad night (1071)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.

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  (816): Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing. http://tfl.nu/pnzr
  Replies (1) Good night (1835) Bad night (649)
• Favorite

  (252): View more from North Carolina

  Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.

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  (252): Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws. http://tfl.nu/qwnl
  Replies (12) Good night (1239) Bad night (810)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation

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  (503): I mean two cocks this time. Trust me, I'm not gonna pull the same stunts as last time in this situation http://tfl.nu/9svf
  Replies (6) Good night (1016) Bad night (636)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.

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  (612): CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me. http://tfl.nu/rba5
  Replies (10) Good night (1721) Bad night (496)
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator

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  (507): I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator http://tfl.nu/y7bc
  Replies (4) Good night (1558) Bad night (551)
• Favorite

  (971): View more from Oregon

  I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this

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  (971): I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this http://tfl.nu/ssq4
  Replies (4) Good night (418) Bad night (958)
• Favorite

  (727): View more from Florida

  His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.

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  (727): His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten. http://tfl.nu/7i5j
  Replies (12) Good night (915) Bad night (305)
• Favorite

  (614): View more from Ohio

  Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me

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  (614): Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me http://tfl.nu/haec
  Replies (9) Good night (701) Bad night (315)

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