Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(312): View more from Illinois

I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk

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(870): View more from Arkansas

At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!

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(949): View more from California

I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.

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(517): View more from Michigan

she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK

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23 Parents Gave Awful Advice about “The Birds and the Bees”
Read it at the TFLN blog
(310): View more from California

do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?

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(925): View more from California

Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.

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(410): View more from Maryland

I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.

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(406): View more from Montana

There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night

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(330): View more from Ohio

we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.

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