I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Let's paint friendship bongs
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Randomize
