so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
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