In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
