and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I got unbelievably drunk yesterday, need some time off. Apparently pulling your balls out to make your buddy's girlfriend miss beerpong shots is frowned upon.
I just watched an old episode of Daria while eating brownies to cure day drunkness. Clearly I'm winning at adulting today.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
