How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
