YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
Randomize
