i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Your first words after putting out the flames, "how am I supposed to eat girls out with my top lip burned off??"
Yeah no more flaming everclear shots.
Puked in the trees at home depot, I told everyone it was fertilizeerr
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I love you. Go after that dick
Should I wear my "kiss me I'm highrish" shirt for my drug screen today?
On another note, I think my upstair neighbor is having sex. How awkward would it be if I showed up to her door with a bag of Chipotle?
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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