so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Randomize