I didn't talk to you tonight because I've decided you look like a man.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
It was weird. Like "Mom, Dad, here's a guy who knows my orgasm face".
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
I just squirted in your honor. It's like pouring one out for the beautiful sex partnership that could have been
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Randomize
