I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
It was so weird. She left to go to the bathroom and her older sister leaned towards me with a creepy smile and said, "You don't deserve her" and then continued to stare at me with a crazy expression for the rest of the evening.
That's kinky shit dude.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
