In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I've lost all respect for marriage since I joined this bachelor party.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
