he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
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Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize