My kitchen smells like failed pina coladas.
Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
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tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
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Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I'm bleeding and have questions
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
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