He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
