Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Just thought i'd let you guys know that my dad was roofied at a lesbian bar last night...
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
I woke up under the stretchy sheet like the corners were still stuck under the bed. I had to wiggle the corners off in order to get up. I was trapped. how did that happen
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize