we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
His phone started ringing when we were pulled over and he said 'hold on, this is most likely more important than you', proceeded to answer it and agree to work sunday, then hung up, looked at the cop and told him to continue.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
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