If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
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