oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
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