It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize