No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
Do you remember telling our cab driver you were going to fuck a penguin?
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
