we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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