He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I am now the proud owner of a 10-12 year old's Optimus Prime costume from Walmart. Tomorrow is going to be a good day.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
He sent me a pic of his Junk. He said it was a Brett Farve valentine.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
Randomize
