omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
In the morning he said my plan to make 2 casseroles today was, "hot in a grandma sort of way," & I didn't think it was weird. THAT'S how hot he was.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
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