plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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