Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Randomize
