Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
Dude I just woke up naked on the floor with my dick in a boot. Legit in a fucking boot. I also have no idea where I am.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
