Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
First night sober since New Years. I'm not sure what hurts more, the hangover or the credit dread when I find out what the tickets to Bali actually cost.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
ARE YOU OKAY?
Physically? Yes. Morally? No.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
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