rhymes with "ouble enetration"
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize