I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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