For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
