I did the walk of shame to another booty call
I don't think that should turn me on, but it does
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
Now he's lighting his socks on fire
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
And my nipple is sore from him biting it. That is not a complaint.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
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