Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
